Once upon a Christmas I gave my on, sometimes off, usually on, but off again boyfriend a navigation system for his car. I pre-ordered it but the shipment date was after the 25th, so instead, I printed out a picture of it, stuck it inside a card, and wrote: “Because love always finds its way back home,”on the envelope.
Wouldn’t it be nice if they made a GPS for our heart?
Something we could wear, or attach to ourselves so that we’d never make a wrong turn onto, “It’s not you, it’s me Ave.” or, “Got fucked over my by ex St.” A type of device that listed all the single, handsome, funny, loyal, and intelligent men within a 20 mile radius of your house, or allowed you to punch in “Dream girl,” and gave you the fastest route to her.
Instead of road closures or traffic times, it would alert you when your woman was cheating on you or your man was only using you for money. Upon getting lost in the woods, a push of a button could summon your best friend, your mom, your dad, your sister, or even your therapist to help you get out. You’d never be stranded. You’d never run outta gas. And you’d always know where the rest areas were.
I think, it would make a killing.
But alas, there are no short cuts in life. And nobody can hold your hand during its entire course. Because the best part is the journey and getting lost along the way. You just never know who you’ll meet when you find yourself on “I’ll never find The One Rd.”
So roll down your windows, and turn up the volume. Put that baby in 5th and let the wind blow through your hair. Do yourself a favor and take the road less traveled, because you’ll never really know a place unless you’ve been there yourself. Pretty soon you’ll know it like the back of your hand. Be aggressive. But always respect the rules of the road. Be safe. Be kind, and give those who are lost directions when you can. Don’t forget to use your turn signals! Make sure to enjoy the scenery but don’t lose focus of your destination.
I’ll see you when you get there.
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