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dearabi

Predictable Predicaments – TBT 04.15.11


I’ve decided that I am a fortune teller when it comes to love. I predict things before they happen, and my track record lately has been impeccable.

One would think I’d use this sixth sense to my advantage. Help out the homies, maybe even come up a little and charge friends of friends. Or at the very least save myself from heartache, ‘cuz I’m over here calling out shit like a referee.

Four kids, three baby daddys, one in the psyche ward, and one still in the picture? Red flag bro. Good looking dude, good job, own spot, never married, no kids, nice ride, nice clothes, and just plain old nice? Seems too good to be true … because he is. And see ole’ girl right there? She is SO HIS TYPE. Bam, a week later they’re talking and laughing and kissing on a Sunday night.

So why do we still manage to get ourselves into “situations” we spotted from miles away? Why do we think we can get away with a round two when we got knocked the fuck out in the first round? How do we manage to put ourselves in such predictable predicaments?

Rach said it’s because we hope these people prove us wrong. It’s a long shot, but maybe you can turn a ho into a housewife. Maybe you are special enough to not change a man (‘cuz we ALL know that ain’t gonna happen) but make a man want to change for the better. I know the last two times you fell in love with your best friend they didn’t feel the same, but maybe this time they will. And maybe, just maybe s/he is in fact, THE ONE.

I see the rationale behind hoping someone will prove us wrong, but I’ve had enough experience to know that in this day and age you can’t expect anything anymore. Shit you can’t even expect to not expect anything. Sometimes, not even from yourself. Because I think that’s one of the real reason we continue to walk down certain paths despite the “Do not enter” signs, dangerous walkways, and ominous shadows that greet us along the way.

We want to prove ourselves wrong.

We hope that this time, we won’t get cold feet just as things are getting hot and heavy and hurt another good girl. We hope that this time, we won’t be self sabotaging and run away from another good guy. We hope that this time, we can handle a casual relationship or at least be smart enough to walk away the minute we realize we can’t.

We hope that this time we won’t be so predictable, and do the exact opposite of what we hope to do.

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