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dearabi

Carpe Dayum.


“Put it on my life baby, I can make you feel right baby. I can’t promise you tomorrow, but I can promise you tonight…”

I’ve had this song shamelessly on repeat since my co-worker played it for me yesterday. It’s been downloaded onto ITunes, posted on my Facebook, tweeted, and embedded on the blog. You jock a song that hard and you’ll eventually start reciting its lyrics in your sleep.

I’m not much for “oots-oots” music, but this specific track just makes me want to feel sexy, and dance the night along with my troubles away, as if there were no tomorrow. And I can’t help but think, it’s such a mans mentality.

And it’s no wonder the female response in the song goes:

“Don’t care what they say, or what games they play, Nothing is enough, ‘Til I have your love, I want you tonight, I want you to stay …”

Granted, I know many men AND women who “seize the day,” but when it comes to relationships? Like my girl said, “Most men only think about the next 30 minutes.” AT THAT. This isn’t to say women shake a guys hand and immediately think of what color curtains to put in their child’s nursery, it’s just that once a woman like me catches feelings, we start to think about the bigger picture. Not about love, marriage, or a baby-carriage – more about getting hurt.

Because it’s all fun and games, and taking things day by day until five months down the line you find yourself making two different batches of spaghetti (‘cuz who the hell else eats whole-grain noodles asides from you?) and realize you’ve fallen in love with this man who still tells other people the two of you are just “going with the flow.”

Don’t get me wrong, I understand and appreciate the whole “carpe diem,” concept but I think some of yall take it too far and use it as an excuse to act recklessly today without having to take responsibility for tomorrow. You get caught up in the moment and fuck someone, or say things you don’t necessarily mean and then wonder why they’re buggin the next day.

But … as much as I’m against this type of irresponsible behavior, I’m also just as much of a fan. In a fucked up way, I actually admire people’s lack of consideration to consider other people’s feelings.  If more women followed this ideal, I think the dating scene would be significantly different to say the least. I tried it out a few weeks ago, and while it’s not my “thing,” it definitely resulted in all sorts of awesomeness lol.

But for some of us, it’s still hard to take things day by day. Especially when you can see someone in your future, whether it be a month from now or even just a week. I know it doesn’t have to be, but like I’ve reiterated a fafillion times before – we cannot control feelings, only the way we respond to them.

So please, think before you act. The present may be a gift, but when someone wraps up their heart for you in a pretty little bow, there are no refunds, no exchanges, and you can’t take shit back within the next 30 days. Especially, when the damage has already been done.

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