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dearabi

9-5

“My man is my man is your man Her, this her man too My man is my man is your man Her, that’s her man Tuesday and Wednesday, Thursday and Friday I just keep him satisfied through the weekend You’re like 9 to 5, I’m the weekend”

Congratulations Sza, you’ve just created the side-chick anthem of the year. I ain’t gonna lie though, that song goes.

By definition, a side-chick is “A mistress; a woman one dates in addition to one’s girlfriend or wife, usually (but not always) in secret”.

I’ve never knowingly been a side-chick. As much self-loathing I did in the past 4 years, I still managed to have enough self-respect (or at least selfishness) to never share a man. More importantly to never fuck with someone already in a substantial relationship. I have however, dated men that I knew were dating other women while I also dated. Because well, that’s what dating is. Right?

Unfortunately, I’m not very good at dating. My heart would catch feelings, but my logic would remind me that I have no right to be jealous. It was during these times where the crazy would take over. I remember the first time Thor the Whore took me out to a crowded club on Saturday night. It got me thinking: He has to like me if he’s taking me to such a public place for everyone to see. Otherwise he wouldn’t bring sand to the beach and fuck up his chances at meeting other girls. And if he is fucking other chicks, I must be his favorite. 

Look at my dumb ass reveling at the thought when I just compared myself to SAND. 

But I get it. Who wants to be that dreadful, obligated 9-5 when you can be the release? The fun? THE WEEKEND! The thing about the weekend is it’s short lived. As triumphant as I would feel going home with Thor from the club Saturday night, he’d still wake me up early the next morning to leave when he went to play ball. Only once did he let me sleep in until he got back, and never did we meet up after for breakfast. 

Maybe what I really wanted to be was his Sunday afternoons going into Monday mornings? Actually, I had him on weekdays too. Still, our time together felt fleeting and we never saw each other two days in a row. Truth is, Monday through Thursday, 5pm – 1am, I was all of these things at one point, but never all of them at the same time and I wanted to be his EVERYDAY.  

So the next time you’re feeling accomplished being someone’s “weekend” as opposed to their “9-5”, remember that you deserve more than just someone that gives you the time of day. 

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