Most of the time, I watch porn and think to myself how in the hell did she do that? It’s like she just gave reverse birth! Then, there...

For me, a penis is a penis, is a penis. As long as there’s nothing green oozing from it and can get the job done, I’m an equal...

I’ve been having a lot of dirty dreams lately. About people I don’t even like, and one that could possible be a figment of my...

My friend mentioned the Tenga Egg last week, and I was completely lost. So he had me YouTube the commercial, and I must say this is...

I haven’t gotten laid in months and pictures of my porn-crush (who just so happens to be the porn-twin of a man I used to date) keep...

For all you whiney motherfuckers complaining that Valentine’s Day is sexist and basically a bunch of bullshit, here: Happy Steak and...

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, me being an ex go-go dancer should come as no surprise to you. For those who haven’t, it’s...

We’ve already come to the consensus that people will do some crazy, not to mention dumb ass shit for LOVE. I’ve personally drove an hour...

A lot of people joke about the health benefits of sex. All over the internet, you can find “facts” about how semen improves your skin,...

Remember when I wrote this story about my girl that never masturbated before? I nearly dropped the ketchup and drove to the nearest Good...

While Gchatting with one of my favorite snow bunnies about tossing salad, she brought up snowballing and explained that it was probably...

I once heard the saying, “The only thing better than having sex, is having sex with someone new.” Now what kind of fucked up shit is...

I think we can all agree that anyone who reads my blog is a fan of sex. Why not? Sex is great. It’s like, fucking AMAZING to be exact....

So I heard this story (hah, you already know it’s going to be at least somewhat good whenever a post starts like that). It’s about this...

Miss Christy Mack, Mack, Mack All dressed in black, black, black With a big dick, dick, dick All up her ass, ass, ass. And what an ass...

During a drunken ride to the BART station one night, a friend of mine said with margarita breath, “Where you going Abi? I’m tryna get on...

While perusing my Instagram feed today, I came across a friend of a friend whose boner needed to be against me like, YESTERDAY. But then...

I’m not sure what took me so long to write about phone sex seeing as it’s pretty common (I think?). Perhaps, it’s the fact that I haven’t...

Don’t get it twisted. There are actors I star fuck, and then there are specific movie characters I want to bang. As if all that didn’t...

Last night I had the worst writers block I’ve had in a while. I got back from dinner and sat in front of my laptop for a good 20 minutes...