If you have any kind of sense, you will have watched the entire first season of Insecure by now and have reveled in it’s glory. While almost every episode was “Gworrrrl” worthy, there was one that compelled me enough to write a blog. It was the one where Issa suggested her bestie Molly try therapy and just like most headstrong women who seemingly have their shit together, the suggestion was met with severe backlash that put a temporary strain on their friendship. For Molly, seeing a therapist suggested something was wrong with her and was the equivalent of a 5150.
As for myself? I first saw a psychologist back in 2009. After taking birth control for eight years straight, I went cold turkey and underwent some sort of chemical imbalance that left me crying on bathroom floors and banging my head against passenger side windows. Whatever it was had me feeling FUCKED UP over my ex who annoyed me so much I broke up with him via text message.
I survived that moment in my life, but unfortunately went through a turn of events that lead me back into a therapy a few years later. In addition to that, I ran the lake. I meditated. I read all the fucking books. I sought help from a spiritual advisor, and didn’t even flinch when he made me sit in the middle of my living room while talking to my “other selves” aka my sofa pillows. I didn’t care how embarrassed or silly I felt, I would’ve done anything to get better.
And I think that’s how you have to look at it. As someone who is taking a small – yet bold step to healing themselves. Not as someone who is crazy, or incapable of healing themselves by themselves. To be completely honest, the therapy sessions didn’t solve my problems. For me, therapy simply provided a safe place for me to vent without feeling guilty about it. I didn’t learn anything new, other than learning that a few of my friends had also seen therapists and this normalized the stigma to me. It made me feel less crazy, and most importantly less alone.
If the only thing holding you back from seeking out help, whether it be therapy or otherwise, is embarrassment or fear of being judged – don’t believe the hype. You don’t have to be depressed to see a therapist. You don’t have to be sad or crazy, or in an unhealthy relationship. And most of all, you are not weak for wanting to get help. For taking the necessary steps to get better. It takes courage to identify pain, get out of bed every morning, into your car, and spill your guts to a stranger.
Therapy may not be the solution for everyone, but it’s definitely not the problem either.