I’ve been told that sex is rarely great the first time. Maybe decent, or even good. But never great. Usually, it’s a little awkward. You aren’t comfortable yet. You still have inhibitions. You’re not yet familiar with what sends chills down the other person’s spine. Or, you’re just plain old “can’t feel my face or produce saliva” wasted. This is why Jey always tells me to give bad/mediocre sex a second chance. Taking all of the above into consideration, I can see why this makes sense. I guess the same thing goes for first dates.
In Make It Count, I wrote about the only two sexual encounters I wish I could take back. To date, that number is still thankfully the same. Compared to other stories I’ve heard, I guess I’m still pretty lucky. While it’s safe to say I would never have sex with those two again, I’d definitely reconsider a “do-over” for any future trysts. Everyone deserves a second chance – including me.
The last time I had sex was good. It resulted in scratch marks I don’t remember making, bruises all over my body, sore biceps*, missing jewelry, some of the best dirty talk (coming from him), cum on my cheek, and a silent scavenger hunt for all my bobby-pins the next morning. I didn’t climax, but the only reason the sex was good and not great was because I felt that my performance was lacking. He came, but for some odd reason I still felt, I don’t know … inadequate? So much, that I was adamant about having a do-over, which I got. Again, he came, but I still left feeling just as unaccomplished as the first time.
Maybe it’s because it felt more like a business deal than moment of passion. Looking back at it, I’m realizing that this feeling more than likely doesn’t even have to do with the actual sex. At any rate, I don’t regret it. Just regret not having more of it. And I suppose I’m grateful for the experience. It’s taught me a valuable lesson in being less critical (not to mention harsh) on others.
You know what they say though, three times a charm.
*I’m sorry, but let me go back to those sore biceps for a second. I spent a good amount of time trying to figure out how I got them. I knew my petite ass wasn’t lifting anyone up. And we all know I can’t do a single push up (2014 resolution anyone?). After reenacting all sorts of possible scenarios and positions, I’m going with “holding myself up against the armchair, while getting fucked from the back standing on my tippy-toes in front of a mirror” for $1,000 Alex!