In the apartment I am currently couch surfing at there are three roommates, all of which are home. But while today feels better than yesterday, I still feel alone. Alone in the most populated city in the United States. Do you know how that feels? You guessed it – lonely.
It’s not that women nowadays shouldn’t feel lonely, we’re just not supposed to admit it. Especially those who are independent, outgoing, driven, and opinionated. The stigma seems to perpetuate lonely women as women on suicide watch, or women who are selfish and too involved in their jobs to have time for anyone else. But what if you’re neither? And what if it’s not a boyfriend, but your girl friend(s) that you miss?
I’ve met some amazing people that have been gracious enough to welcome me into their homes, lives, and circles in New York. And whenever my alarm goes off at 9pm, I always make sure to thank the universe for them. However, I’ve come to realize that friendship circles do in fact have expiration dates. I don’t mean you have until October 25th to redeem your friendship with someone, I mean that once you get to a certain age, you will have made all the friends you need in your life.
After that, you’ll still meet people that you get along with. People that have the same interests as you. People to go to the Rihanna concert, and basketball game with. People that make you laugh, and maybe even people you can go on vacation and take pretty pictures with. But as awesome as these new friends are, they will never replace your GIRLS (or your boys for that matter). Just like you can never take the place of theirs.
Now before you take to Craigslist to put a personal ad out on friends, calm down. Obviously, this isn’t a rule or anything. Nor is it some elitist clique propaganda to prevent you from making new friends past 30. I’m just trying to emphasize the importance of choosing the people in your circle wisely. As if they were the last friends you’d make. Surely then, you wouldn’t waste time with people who bring you down or are just there to fill up space. While it’s different for everyone, I no longer count how many friends I have. I just look around and know that the people in it, are the ones that count.