I said it here and I’ll say it again: bitches love them some brunch. At least me and mine do. But somewhere within the last two years or so, brunch became Justin Bieber big. How do I know? Because out of nowhere, people started to hate it. What was once condemned to Mother’s Day or Easter, is now a weekend rite of passage for some people. As with most things that get popular fast, they get hated on just as fast as seen in Jordana Rothman’s article that Jozen linked HERE. While her reasons for hating brunch are justified, I still wanted to defend some of the things mentioned in her post in solidarity with all my fellow brunch lovers out there.
1. That bottomless booze is bullshit. Only if you don’t like mimosas, don’t plan on getting drunk, or don’t know math. Only then is it bullshit. If your mimosa limit is 2 at $6.00, you obviously shouldn’t get bottomless mimosas for $14.00. I do however, agree that late-day hangovers suck (and are sometimes worse than morning after hangovers) and not to order unlimited Bloody Mary’s. Simply because you’re bound to get a V-8 mixed with cheap vodka. And as a Bloody Mary connoisseur, it just wouldn’t be right.
2. Even if you wanted to, you can’t legally order any of that rotgut until noon. Me and my girls have no problem with this, because it’s very rare we’re going to be making brunch reservations for 9:30am anyway. That’s the beauty of brunch, it’s our favorite breakfast foods and then some, at a reasonable hour for those who are either lazy or hungover from the night before.
3. The crowd. Oh dear God the crowd. I guess this really depends on what restaurant you’re going to, but for the most part this is somewhat true. Usually, the higher the rating on Yelp the more obnoxious the patrons. More than likely you’ll be sitting next to a group of loud-ass girls (one still in their “walk of shame” outfit) talking about who they fucked the night before, or who they’re going to fuck after brunch. But I mean, what else are you supposed to talk about over french toast and chorizo?
4. The interminable lines. Lines do suck, what can I say? I’m not saying I’ve never waited more than I should’ve just to eat eggs benedict, but I am saying that I’ve went across the street to get me something to hold me over until I did get inside. DON’T JUDGE ME. You can definitely save your time and money by making bacon and eggs at home, but then it wouldn’t be as fun “checking in” on Four Square.
As you can see, I definitely see the validity in everything Jordana is saying. Brunch lines can be ridiculously long, and steak and potatoes are tastier than pancakes. Nevertheless, I still love brunch. I love sitting outside on a beautiful Sunday afternoon and talking shit about the people pass by while I sip my coffee. I love recalling last nights debauchery with my girls, and looking through iPhone pictures I don’t even remember taking. Oh, and I guess I love the food too: chicken and waffles, shrimp grits, croque madame – alladat, GIMME GIMME! The only thing worse than someone hating something because it got popular, is someone hating something because hating it got popular as well.