A kinda, sorta, not really out of order continuation from this post.
And I never thought it would ever get this far. Whoever coined the phrase “Out of sight, out of mind,” must not have been wearing their glasses. Love is blind. Yet I see you at the end of my tunnel. I must be in the wrong tunnel.
I’m OK, I swear. I’m fine. I’m fine. Except for when I’m home at night. When my roommate is asleep, and the new episodes are already done and on repeat. I sit on the couch, or lay in bed and think … about finding a job, how my family is back home. Or what my best friends are doing. I think about all the things that are important to me. And then I think of you.
We’re in the midst of a natural disaster and all I worry about is if you’ll still think of me. Sandy is making headlines, but you’re the only name running through my mind. I’m tired of chasing you. I should’ve brought a bike.
The sun is shining through my window and it feels amazing against my back. Still, I think of how stupid I must look. I dwell on how stupid I feel. I have no business owning these feelings. I constantly have to remind myself that you have none. At least not for me. Why do I feel this way? Nothing makes sense. I wish you’d just go away. Oh wait. You are.
The thing is. As soon as I miss you, I remember why I shouldn’t. Then soon as I hate you, I remember why I can’t. I am such a fool. You know what? FUCK YOU.
Maybe this time I won’t be so blind. And will epitomize all that “Out of sight, out of mind”.
I love you. Too.
I just have nothing left for you tomorrow.