Like I said here, my bests are/were someone else’s worst. And when they’re telling me to forget about some douchebag who doesn’t deserve me, someone else is drying the tears of some poor girl saying the same shit about them. I always looked at you as a “good guy,” even when you refused the title. I figured you just wanted to be cool. After all, no one wants to be known as the nice guy. I will tell you one thing though, you’re stubborn as fuck.
You always tell me stories about the girls you see, and I always tell you how it feels to be that girl in an attempt to provide some sort of perspective. Maybe even make you sympathize – if not understand how she feels. Make you remember how it feels to be the friend of that girl, and having to receive a crying phone call at 2am. Then, you go ahead and do the wrong thing anyway *youuuuuu*.
And now you’re like this. Open,
and honest and not holding back. Suppressing your crazy, and embracing the gay. Instagram pics #nofilter, and Facebook updates. Blog posts, and smiley face emoticon text messages. It’s amusing to say the least, but also heartfelt, and I won’t lie – bittersweet.
Because seeing you out of your element like this has let me know how much you really do like this girl. The way you’re acting now, is how someone should act when they’re genuinely interested in someone. When they want to get to know them, and make them smile, and be the reason they can see clearly through dirty windows.
Unfortunately and fortunately, it also let me know how much he didn’t like me.
So I guess … thank-you. In the most fucked up way only soul mates can appreciate. Thank you for reminding me that I deserve so much more, by unknowingly pointing out how he gave me so little. Because I’m always telling you stories about the guys I see, and you always tell me how it feels to be that guy in an attempt to provide some sort of perspective. Next time, I’ll make sure the only call you receive from me at 2am is a drunk one telling you how happy I am.